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I continue to be appalled that many of the public schools let the kids snack whenever they want to – all day if they want to. It starts at 9 sometimes (some kids eat breakfast at 7, apparently). As a sub I find it distracting and annoying and I don’t think it’s good for them. The teachers tell me, “Well, adults eat when they want to, so kids should too.” Balderdash. Adults shouldn’t snack all day either. This happens for every age (although not all teachers allow it), but especially once they get to be in 5th grade or higher.

I LOVE teaching P.E. On Friday I was able to decide on the activity – indoors or out – or just give the kids free play for 50 minutes. I conducted 6 amusing, awesome classes of a game I titled “Rock-Paper-Scissors-Capture”. Two opposing teams face each other on the mid-gym yellow lines. I choose two kids to do rock-paper-scissors-shoot (as they say it -it’s a game EVERYone knows). The winning side then chases the losing side, tagging them before they ram themselves into the blue mats on the wall. If caught, they become a member of the chasing team.

We did this for about half an hour – long enough for all 25 kids in a class to have at least 2 turns. It was SO amusing. The fun part is that they have a split second to decide which way to run – are they the chaser or the chased? I loved watching their facial expressions –  joy – confusion – consternation – laughter at themselves. One kids said, “This is nerve wracking!”  🙂 At times nearly the whole team would run the wrong way. Every turn there would be some who started running one way – then realized  – “Wait – WE had paper and THEY had rock” and they would turn around and sometimes bump into another confused person who had just reached the same realization. So Jane might be chasing Todd and then suddenly they’d both be laughing as Todd turned and chased Jane.

It was hilarious. The kids laughed and laughed. And, being they are 10 years old, there was the requisite amount of boys throwing themselves onto the floor, kids making sure they got caught so they could go back to the other team, and a few collisions. When one side would get down to four kids (or once it got down to only ONE girl) the excitement grew, but it never ended with one side vanquished. They took each “versus” (their word) seriously.

THIS is a game where anyone can win. Less athletic kids had just as much fun, and kids normally on the fringe during sports activities were just as likely to win – and losing was just as much fun anyway.

After about 30 minutes I could sense a lull (or a couple kids would ask if we were going to do anything else). A student in the first class had told me about what they did at THEIR camp – so that created our second activity: Last Person Standing.

Everyone found a partner (and if there was an odd number, I partnered with the person). They stood back to back and when I blew the whistle, they spun around – did rock-paper-scissors-shoot – and the one who didn’t win (better than saying “Losers”) sat down. The winners raised a hand – and then they found a new partner. We kept going until someone was the victor. The victors from rounds 1 and 2 did a semifinal playoff and the same for rounds 3 and 4. Then the semifinalists played for the grand championship.

Well – I had forgotten how LOUD excited 10-year-olds can be inside of a school gym.
Especially the boys! (One girl asked me – why are they so excited – it’s just a game! I replied – they are BOYS!) But when it was a boy and a girl – wow. Suddenly little overweight Tony was in the spotlight: “TO-NEEE! TO-NEEEE! TO-NEEEE!” I watched his face as all attention focused on him. The girls got into it too: “SAR-AHHH! SAR-AHHH! SAR-AHHH!”  Sarah was a bit embarrassed at first, but she stepped forward for the big match. I said a few announcer-like words to drag out the moment a little longer – and then the match – which of course takes about 3 seconds to complete – unless they keep “matching” with the same choices – which makes it even funnier if it goes on 4 or 5 times, as it often did – and then the winner was surrounded by fans all screaming his or her name. The boys ushered one grinning winner around the gym – I half-expected them to carry him. I wish I could have photographed the look on Tony’s face.

Perhaps needless to say – the boys HATED it when the girls won. 🙂 Even more amusing. Believe me, if the Detroit Lions ever want to double the decibel level of their cheering fans, they need only invite ONE of these fifth grade groups of boys to the game.
Could make an interesting school fundraiser…..

Again – this was a game ANYbody could win, and I am certain that a few of the winners had NEVER been in the limelight in the gym before. It was awesome. It was hilarious. It was too loud (I had to put my fingers in my ears a few times). But we all loved it.

Occasionally someone would feel upset when eliminated in the first part of a round. I saw a few nearly-hidden tears wiped away. But once they realized that they didn’t have to sit out for very long, they all got involved in supporting champions instead.

Now, at Campfire Summer Bible Camp – we played this with Wizards, Giants, and Elves.
But I knew that I would be in for a consistent barrage of “Wait, which one takes which one?” if we played that way. Instead – I took a game that they play all of the time and found two ways to adapt it for fun in P.E. class. 5 out of 6 of the classes caught on quickly, but with just enough confusion to keep it funny. One of the classes was still “not getting it” after 15 minutes of play.  Or maybe they just preferred to run to the safe zone every time “just in case”. 🙂

Yesterday a fifth grade girl asked me first thing in the morning what kind of reviews I had received as a substitute teacher. I turned it around, of course, and asked her what kind of reviews she had received as a student when there is a substitute teacher. She wasn’t sure what to say. I told her that I had been voted “the best guest teacher EVER” and I had also been called mean – it all depended on the class’s behavior.

She was fine. It was A. who was a continuous pain in the backside. I sent him to the office at one point. After half an hour, they sent him back. I used the teacher’s method of giving them a mark the first time they wouldn’t cooperate, then 2, then 3. He couldn’t find his work in his desk, so I went through it with him and found it. I probably embarrassed him when I announced (after hearing him declare over and over for 5 minutes that it didn’t exist) that it had been found. He refused to do it, tore part of it, ate a piece of it, and wrinkled the packet some. Eventually I told him he had to go to the office, and before I could call, he just walked out. I informed the office that he had left, and they kept him for the rest of the day, thankfully.

I know that kids have problems. But somehow, sometime, they have to realize that they canNOT stop education from taking place for the rest of the students in the class. Like that matters to them even a little. 😦

I showed the fifth grade Science class an episode of “Bill Nye, the Science Guy” about atoms and molecules. Afterwards I asked if anyone knew what an atom bomb is. Dennis raised his hand.
“An atom bomb, more commonly known as a nuclear bomb, gets its energy by splitting atoms – usually made out of uranium or plutonium – to release neutrons and cause other atoms to split. In doing this in a short amount of time, it releases so much energy that a huge explosion occurs.”
My grin grew as wide as my surprise, and I noted that the other 26 kids stayed quiet and smiled, indicating that they were proud of the member of their class they refer to as “the genius.”  He reminded me of my son David at that age. I asked him to write it down for me later, and he was hesitant to write it (also like my son David) but he was willing to repeat most of it (there was actually a little more)to me later so that I could write it down. I gave him a high five and encouraged him in his scientific studies.

Simple enough request: do the small amount of assigned work without talking loudly, turn it in, have a nice day. Sure, you can even listen to music on your iPhone while you work (per school rules). Instead: ignoring me, disrespecting me, causing disruption, arguing with me about whether they ignored me, disrespected me or caused disruption. One girl said, “I’m graduating in 3 weeks and nothing you do or say today will change that.” True. But she might not like the detention she has to serve tomorrow. I called the principal and sent a few kids down to him. But by the last period, I really found it difficult to care anymore. When almost the whole class does it – they figure they can get away with it, and I was tired, and trying not to be visibly upset. I know some of them cheated off their classmates’ papers. I left a note for the teacher and I was very happy to leave at the end of the day. If all goes well, I’ll never go back there again. Since it had gone well there before, it was the last school in Redford that I was willing to go to.

I was waiting for the 5th grade kids to transition from one subject to another. Being in a silly mood, I placed my hand under the overhead projector (referred to as the Elmo – I thought because it’s red like the Muppet, but it’s the name of the company that makes/sells them.) I curled and uncurled my fingers as they approached the camera, so that it looked on the whiteboard-screen like something was coming towards the students. Some of them noticed and laughed.

Then J. got up, hurried to the front of the room and flattened himself against the whiteboard feigning fright so that it looked like the “monster hand” was capturing him. Everybody cracked up – especially me. I told him that he has great comedic timing. He smiled and asked, “Is that a good thing?” I responded that it all depends on when and how he uses it. 🙂 To me – it showed a quick wit – he saw that I was being silly (which gave him liberty to do so as well) – saw a way to enhance it into further comedy, and pulled it off.

Once a year the school has ACES: All Children Exercising Simultaneously for an hour.
Last year we walked around the building for a half an hour – which got pretty old for most kids after about 20 minutes. Another time the kids walked around the outside track. Today the 6th graders, due to a grant, were bused to University of Michigan to participate in some exercising there.

The fifth graders were split into two groups: one in the cafeteria, and one in the gym. In the cafeteria, we did line dancing (most, but not all, of which I was able to participate in). Then, in the gym, they played volleyball using a larger, lighter ball and basically just serving it and hitting it back and forth with great levity and not a whole lot of rules and even less strategy.  At the outset, several members of the class suggested playing boys vs. girls, and I said okay. It turned out to be a smart move. The girls had go-getters and stand-backers that played, tending to group together all in the middle and ignore the entire left side of the playing area. The boys were mostly hot shots with a penchant for flinging themselves onto the floor whenever they thought it would bring them a laugh, with a few shy guys on the fringes that hit the ball occasionally. There was one particularly exciting round where the ball made it back and forth (and even once into the next class’s territory where it was hit back and continued in play) about 8-10 times.

Over all it was a pretty good day. This was a different Livonia school, but fifth grade was a good bunch. Well, I did send L. to the resource room within 5 minutes of the beginning of math class, but according to my subbing notes, that was pretty well expected. Poor boy had “no idea” what he could possibly be doing to distract anyone. Sigh.   I did talk to another fifth grade teacher who said she has 9 uncooperative boys in her class this year. I’m going to remember her name and avoid that bunch.

Best.Class.Ever.

That’s what I wrote on the whiteboard after half a day in Mrs. W’s 5th grade class at a Livonia school today. They were attentive, responsive, respectful, and kind, and they did their work as told. I got to teach them their math lesson and give them some background and side information that I thought might help their understanding of why we need and use graphs. I got to joke with them a bit. I taught reading and Social Studies – and I LOVE having a microphone. 🙂  A lot of classes have microphones for the teachers and students to use as necessary. As I read to them or gave directions, I hammed it up – using low bass voices, sound effects, high pitched tones and my “Best Actress” reading. It was FUN! When not enough students were volunteering to read, I started calling on the ones who were not volunteering. Passing the mic around helped a lot with the quieter students. No one balked at reading out loud. A few stumbled on a word or two and I helped them.

Then I worked in another 5th grade in the afternoon, and that went very well too. I monitored a Social Studies class for yet another 5th grade, and managed to remember the “info bag” when we had a surprise fire drill. We had five minutes to kill at the end of the day before we were allowed to get in line for the buses, so I asked if they wanted to learn – you guessed it – the “Pizza Hut Song”. 🙂 I have only done it with this age group once before, but they said “Yes” so – in five minutes we sang thru 3 stanzas twice (a little quickly the second time.) Out of the 26 10- & 11-year olds, I’d say that about half were enthusiastic, another 5 were mildly amused, and the others “wouldn’t be caught dead singing that.”

I am wondering. I worked at this school last year a lot. The fifth grades were always wonderful, but the sixth grades were so awful that I quit going there. So – I assumed that THIS year the sixth grades – being that they were awesome last year – would be awesome this year too. Not so! I worked with sixth graders a week or two ago, and they had a number of kids who were a real pain. But the fifth graders are great. So – I find myself wondering now – if there’s something about how the sixth grade TEACHERS conduct their classes that leads to the kids being sassier and more rebellious – or is it just that they are one year older – and the older kids in a 5th-6th grade only upper elementary?

I met another sub who is doing his doctorate on the Detroit Public School system and the reforms that are underway or on the way. I started telling him about my good education in the DPS, and about the earliest segregation – which I was there for – until my parents joined the white flight to a different area of Detroit. Another teacher in the lunchroom told about her education in the DPS system and also about her teaching experience, including at Noble School (where my brother Dennis and I started) and at Lessinger Jr. High (where my brother Dennis attended). She had a lot of stories to tell. We both gave him our contact info in case he wants to hear more – and I told about another friend of mine who just retired from teaching in the DPS a few years ago.

Something I learned: the schedule for our day at Dixon Elementary (Auburn and Tireman in Detroit – now a boarded up vandalized mess 😦  )  was called the Platform Method (or program?).  We had “homeroom” for half of the day, which included reading, writing, and social studies. During the other half, another class had “homeroom” with that teacher, and we would have four classes, passing from one to the next throughout the school. We had math and science every day, and we switched off gym, art, drama (called auditorium class), and music.        I asked the other teacher if she thought that system was better, and she said each has its benefits.  A big benefit was that there were dedicated math and science teachers for all of the kids grades 3-7.  Nowadays, in many schools, the teacher handles those and just sends the kids out for gym, music, art, and computer lab (although sometimes he/she teaches the latter also). There are some schools that do not have music or do not have art.    In the Livonia schools, there isn’t a Platform method, but most of the teachers swap with another teacher – usually Science for Social Studies, but sometimes also Math for Reading/Writing.   It lets people teach in their strongest areas.

If it was up to me, I would not have ANY hot lunch at ANY school. I think it’s a waste of time and money. You don’t get more nutrition because it’s hot (read: warm) and they mostly offer pizza and (really awful) nuggets and frozen fish fillets and stuff because that’s what kids might be willing to buy.

I’d have two or three kinds of sandwiches available, fruit, fresh veggies, cookies, milk, apple juice, and that’s about it. Food. Nourishment. It’s NOT a restaurant, folks! The stuff they serve at the elementary schools is awful – and they make the kids take 5 items to get every food group – and at least 2 of them go right into the trash bin. I nearly gagged on the “nuggets”. Sandwiches would be fresher, too, than the pre-made stuff they re-heat.

Who started the idea that a “hot” lunch would be a better idea?

Maybe I’m prejudiced because I always took my lunch to school, except for once in awhile in 7th and 8th grade when the school had hot dogs or spanish rice (and back then they actually cooked all the food there, didn’t just re-heat stuff) or in high school when the cheerleaders sold sloppy joes on Wednesdays to raise money.

Just think of the savings if they don’t need stoves or microwave ovens. Likely they’d need fewer staff members too. Food would be fresher, and it could likely be done quicker. No more fried foods and stuff that tastes like I imagine cardboard would.

“Miss Sharon?”
“Miss Sharon?”
“Miss Sharon?”

The first 10 times that A. asked me a question or told me something he considered newsworthy didn’t bother me in the least. He was one of 24 and it was pretty normal for 1st graders. But as the morning wore on, and A. turned out to also be one of those children who has to be re-directed (that’s what we say instead of corrected, in the teacher biz) consistently, my patience was wearing thin.

“A, please go back to your seat.”
“A, go back to your seat.”
“A, SIT DOWN!”
“A, stop talking.”
“A, line up – don’t you want to go to gym?”
“A, you need to get your book bin and stay in ONE PLACE, NOT keep moving all over the room.”
I was exasperated, and started to wonder if I could ask that he go to another classroom for the rest of the day. It was difficult to help, answer, re-direct, teach, or enjoy the other 24 kids with his consistent neediness.

A., I thought, is one of those 5-minute kids. He either asks a question, tells me something, or does something that initiates a reprimand – literally – every 5 minutes. He MUST talk. The only way I got him to do his writing assignment was by telling him that I would take his name off the “frowny-face board” if he did it. He quickly copied what was on the board, added about 4 more sentences of his own, interrupting whatever I was doing at least twice to show me that he was writing more.

He didn’t line up for lunch – he was messing around with a few other boys in the back of the room. During our 1-hour movie, he sat in the front next to his nearly-as-loud buddy and provided a commentary (I turned on the subtitles – mostly for me).

At the end of the day, I got everyone lined up in proper order (Bus #2, Bus #4, walkers, Zumba-class, that sort of thing), and right away my “scout” informed me that A.’s mom was there to pick him up. Feeling relieved, I called out to him, “A., your mom is here!”
“That’s my grandma,” A. said. “My Mom passed away.” And as he headed out the door, he said, “I miss my Mom.” Then he stepped back in and asked, “Oh – Miss Sharon, can you tie my shoe first?”
Tears stung my eyes, as I said in my kindest voice, “Sure. Have a good evening, A.”
I went home and cried.

Low Self-Confidence. Ah, I remember those high school days of low self-confidence when I worried about having one hair out of place. I found it interesting that even a Muslim girl in a hijab may act that way. I watched as she adjusted the folds again and again in front of a mirror, and again later on in the classroom.  How long was it before I realized that the constant adjustment drew more attention to me than the actual “hair out of place” did? I hoped for her, that she will realize her beauty and the irrelevance of exactly how the folds fall.

High school classes. I’ve had a couple good days in Melvindale. Mostly, with high school, my job is to take attendance, re-direct them to stay on task, make sure nobody gets too loud or boisterous, and try not to be bored. 🙂  In the English classes last week, the assistant ran the show, as I mentioned. Today in US History I was on my own (which I actually prefer). 6 out of 7 of the classes were fine. The kids are respectful, and even when I took a couple of phones away, no one got nasty about it.

Drawing. Two girls remembered me from last year because I drew a picture of one of them. They asked how my drawing was coming along, so I had fun showing my recent portraits that were on my cell phone. The one girl was amazed. 🙂

Argument! The 7th hour (last class) was very loud and some students were throwing foul language around (against the school rules). A loud argument broke out between a white boy and a Muslim girl. I don’t know how it started, but they were angrily yelling back and forth. Since they would not stop, I sent them both down to the office – but not before the girl “got into it” with a black girl in the back of the room. So, equal opportunity detentions for all races are the likely result. I called the office to let them know they were coming, wrote down what happened, and sent the note down, at office request.   After they left, two other boys continued to make racial comments, and I firmly told them to stop it right then. They did. I did write it on the report, though, because racial slurs and foul language are against school rules. They didn’t actually use pejorative terms about their target, but they were saying negative things about Muslims in the school.   For a moment during the argument, I thought one of them might hit the other – I was concerned, but not afraid.